Growing up, you might’ve always heard about sex. You know that it’s a sexual activity that two people engage in when they feel comfortable doing so, but you don’t actually know what it’s like. Maybe now you’re just curious about sex, or you’ve decided to have sex—whatever your reason may be, here are a few things that you should know before your first time.
Tip #1: Openly communicate with your partner before having sex
Communication is key to making any relationship work because it allows you to effectively share your apprehensions, thoughts, and feelings with your partner. Talking things out is especially important in terms of sex (even though it may seem awkward) because the two of you can take the necessary steps to ensure that the other person is as comfortable as possible.
Now you might be wondering: what should my partner and I be talking about? How can we both understand each other better? Some of the topics you and your partner can cover are your consent and boundaries, protection and safety measures, turn-ons and preferences, expectations for your relationship, and medical histories.
Having an honest conversation with your partner about these things before engaging in any sexual activity can also help you avoid misunderstandings and other further complications in the future.
Tip #2: Take the time to familiarize yourself with your body
One of the reasons why most people feel nervous or uncomfortable during their first time is because they have not taken the time to understand their bodies. While there’s no right way to have sex, it’s helpful to know what sex looks or feels like so that you have a general idea of what you’ll be getting into.
Masturbation is one way to help you get well-acquainted with your body. Contrary to popular belief, masturbating does have several benefits, including self-assurance and confidence in yourself and your body. Once you’ve figured out what feels best for you, you’ll be able to tell your partner how they can pleasure you better.
Tip #3: Prepare yourself and your partner for safer sex
There will always be potential risks in engaging in sexual activities, which is why it is important to prepare for safer sex. Safer sex or safe sex is about protecting yourself and your partner against sexually transmitted infections. There are multiple ways for you to make sex safer. For instance, using condoms during sex can help you prevent getting STDs since sexual fluids and skin-to-skin contact are common transmitters of the infection.
Additionally, even if you consistently use barriers like condoms and feel completely good, being tested for STDs on a regular basis is still a part of safer sex. The majority of STD patients have no symptoms and are unaware that they are sick, making it easy for them to infect their partners. Therefore, the only way to be certain if someone has an STD is through testing.
Tip #4: Take it slow and don’t forget to have fun!
Sex is supposed to be a pleasurable experience, so there’s really no need to rush. Try not to overthink what comes next by being present with your partner. Take a second to tune in, focus, and concentrate on your body. You can do this by either noticing what you’re feeling, listening to your breathing or feeling the sensations of your partner’s touch.
To make the experience even more enjoyable for you and your partner, you could try on and wear lingerie. Not only will it help boost your confidence during sex, but it can also provide your body support. Putting on lingerie is more than just clothing as it can spice up your relationship and make things extra intimate for you and your partner.
Not sure where to start? Intimate Room Lingerie is a local Philippine lingerie brand that has your back. Intimate Room Lingerie has a variety of products for you to choose from. They have highly comfortable intimates “from basic thongs, crotchless panties, cute bralettes, non-wired to wired, multi-lingerie sets, bondage, and more.” You can check out their Instagram page and official website if you’re interested!
Taking your time, being in the moment, and having fun helps you loosen up and, ultimately, takes the pressure off of having sex for the first time.
It’s completely normal to not know what to do when you’re having sex for the first time. Everyone gets anxious, but being comfortable, safe, and protected can help you make your experience the best that it can possibly be.