You’ve been: ghosted. 

Or you ghosted them–either way, online dating doesn’t always end in “happily ever after,” most especially during the pandemic. 

To refresh our minds, let’s go over the cliche/stereotypical/unspoken casual dating rules: 

  1. You don’t text them immediately after the first date.
  2. You don’t sleep with them until the third date. 
  3. You don’t post them on your social media until you’ve DTR’d (Determined the Relationship). 

…or at least these were the rules on the movies I’ve grown up watching have taught me. But what about the films that state the dating rules when all you can do is talk on a dating app all day? What about the film that teaches the dating rules on what to do when the whole world is in the middle of a pandemic and nobody is supposed to go out? 

Well that film doesn’t exist (yet?). 

Let’s get real: online dating (or just dating in general) is difficult. Especially for our (commitment-fearing) generation that has fully immersed itself in the hook-up culture. We like to swipe right on dating apps, talk for a day or two, meet up for a drink, sleep together, then the waiting game begins–wondering if you’re about to get ghosted or if whatever the two of you have going on is about to blossom into something much more. 

But this pandemic just makes the routine we’ve gotten used to so much more difficult. We can’t meet up, we can’t grab a drink, and we most definitely can’t hook up; that leaves us with one option: talking. 

All day. Having to come up with topics to talk about.

‘Katamad ‘diba? 

Even if you have the time and energy to talk the whole day with that one really cute person you matched with last night, who’s to say you’ll have the time and energy tomorrow? 

Personally, my favourite part about being in a committed relationship is reaching that point where I can be silent around them without feeling awkward; just my tired-from-work quiet self who wants to be around my partner without the obligation to say a word.

But dating during the new normal has made this almost impossible. Although developing a relationship through a webcam has been proven possible by our titas and titos, this scenario has a very slim chance of working out for our generation, which sucks, but that’s okay. 

There’s always a silver lining, though. Again, dating in the new normal sucks, but it’s okay. It’s probably time for our generation to learn a thing or two about being vulnerable and going filter-less for the eyes of the people we’re trying to impress. When there’s nothing left to do, we talk, and that is definitely foreign to our generation; it’s scarier than any ghosts we’re bound to encounter as we swipe countless times on our dating apps. 

Sorry to all the people whose top love language is physical touch; it’s time to make room for those who thrive off of words of affirmation. 

Happy swiping! 

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